By Rachel Puryear

When people meet couples who like to travel via RV or van together a lot – like my husband and I like to do – one common response is, “how do you share such a small space without fighting all the time?!”

That’s a fair question; and certainly; traveling this way does require mutual cooperation, communication, and patience with one another. However, it doesn’t have to doom your relationship, or mean a trip fraught with arguments, mutual resentment, and constantly getting on one another’s nerves.

That said, this travel style is still not for every couple – even many solid couples need more space, and prefer other travel styles.

However, if you’re considering traveling via RV or van on the road with your significant other, here are some considerations to help keep your trip pleasant and fun, and come back feeling even closer to each other:

Have an Open Discussion Before You Go

Before you set out on the road, talk about everything with your partner or companion – the obvious, the less obvious, and the downright gross and smelly.

Discuss things like how you will manage things like sharing a bathroom with limited privacy, how you’ll deal when showers and laundry aren’t as available as you would like, how you’ll have sex comfortably in your camping vehicle (without attracting unwanted attention), and managing bodily functions generally in a really tight space.

Consider how you’ll both respond, and how you might (or might not) work well together when problems come up on the road – getting lost, encounters with police or occasional unfriendly locals, vehicle breakdowns or even accidents, changes of plans, lack of vacancies in accommodations and road closures, and more potential problems. Such problems will eventually come up, but it’s how you deal with them together that is key.

Ask yourselves how much on the same page you are – do you both like to travel at a similar pace? Do you go to bed and rise, and work and play at similar times? Can you share the chores and duties in a way that’s mutually satisfactory? Do you both want to visit the same places? Do you have similar travel styles in mind (frugal, high-end, or in-between)? Do you like to do most activities together, do a lot separately, or a mix of both – and it you like some separate activities, how will you manage that?

Consider your budget, as well, and make sure you’re in agreement around that – who’s paying for what, what you’ll spend money on, how much you’re spending overall, and make sure you have a good idea of what to expect things to cost. Err on the side of assuming things will cost 10-20% more in total than you think it will, because there are always things that people forget. Also err on the side of assuming things will take somewhat longer than you expect, because more often than not, they do.

It Doesn’t Have to Be Perfect

Just because you had a fight on your trip – even if it was a big one, and early on – doesn’t necessarily mean your future travel plans together are doomed.

Even couples that get along the best on the road, and have done it for a while, will argue from time to time – and tempers will occasionally flare. Especially in the midst of a lot of frustrating situations, and when people are cranky or tired or not feeling well. It’s just a part of the ride, as it were.

You just don’t usually see that part in the perfectly gorgeous Instagrammed photos.

Compromise is Key

Many, if not all, of the above-referenced points of discussion with your road partner lend themselves to some degree of compromise.

As always with compromise, there needs to be some degree of give and take from both parties in order to make it sustainable (not necessarily equally in every respect, but more overall). Furthermore, the willingness of everyone involved to compromise is a very good indicator that you guys are well suited to do this type of traveling together – while the opposite is likely true if there is a lack of mutual willingness to compromise.

It’s also good to start together with smaller trips closer to home, rather than a big, faraway trip as your first road trip together. Then, you can work up to the bigger trips, assuming that these early ones go well. You will also gradually learn more about each other every time – often things you wouldn’t as much while back at home – and this will also help you better get used to being together out on the road. This will also make you more comfortable together out there.

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Thank you, dear readers, for reading, following, and sharing. Here’s to deepening your relationship out on the road.

Check out my other blog, too – World Class Hugs, at https://worldclasshugs.com. It’s about celebrating empathic and HSS/HSP people, balanced versus toxic relationships, loving spirituality and spiritualism without religious dogma, and visiting gorgeous natural places.

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